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There are some things that I don't care about.  There are other things that bother me but I can brush off in moments and keep moving.  Then there are things that fucking piss me off that I refuse to let go of and make me want to fight to the death.   

Managers bug me.  You do your job, I'll do mine and we can all be happy and get things done.  Micromanage me and we will have a problem.  I will have attitude and you can fuck off.  But accuse me of petty theft... we'll get to that.   

...

The last time I worked I informed my GM that I was pregnant, one of the managers that knew we were trying was there and I shared with her as well.   Most of the store knows I'm pregnant. 

One of the managers that I rather like(d), the same one that knew we were trying, one that I consider(ed) close to a friend, is leaving the store and transferring over to another store in the restaurant chain.  I (was) sad to hear this and it (was) even more sad because she is being replaced with a manager I worked with before and really don't like! 

I was talking to her about it and kind of teasing her, asking why would she leave us?   She defensively said: "I wouldn't leave you guys if I didn't have to!  You know I care about you all, I just can't do it here any more."   Which I understood was for her sanity.  

This restaurant is falling apart.  It doesn't run smoothly.  It's not managed properly.  No one listens to the managers.  There's no sense of team.  People quit, walk out, or stop showing up every day.  And the managers fire people at a whim, one mistake & you're out!  The place is pretty crappy.

I've thought about quitting several times and really wanted to just walk out several times.  From people not doing the jobs they were hired for, people not showing up at all or calling out everyday to shitty customers that think the world revolves around them.  The place is not worth the stress but it pays.  

Then next time I go into work, I'm ten minutes late because I fell asleep and really didn't feel like getting up for work.  I get there and clock in, per-the-usual.  I'm looking around at what needs to be done and wondering if the sections are set up yet when the GM comes over to me and asks me if I'm clocked in and if I'll go to the office.   Now, she's told me several times before that I'm one of the best servers she's got and most everyone loves me at this store.  So, I'm joking around with her asking if I'm "in trouble" with a little laugh.  When we get to the office the manager that I was talking about above is in there and the GM closes the door.  I joke again, "oh, wow!  closing the door.  I must be in big trouble!"  Honestly thinking that I'm done nothing wrong and not having a clue what is going on.

The GM hands and asks me to sign this paper:

What the actual fuck?

Sitting in the office, coming to realize what is going on, starting to swell with emotion, I couldn't quite comprehend what exactly the page was saying after reading the word "termination" checked at the top of the page.

Talk about unprofessional: after I was given this paper and asked to sign it the phone rang and that took precedence over what was happening in the office.

They didn't have much to say to me except for the few phrases that they kept repeating: "This is  the way it has to be."  "This has to happen."  The manager said that this was happening because she saw me do it.  The GM wanted to know who else was doing it.

So what? I'm supposed to rat out my co-workers?  I explained to them that when I was in training I was told by my trainer that I could take off the 10% discount if they left the money on the table.  A little extra change in my pocket.  I explained that because my trainer told me I could, I didn't think much of it, and I didn't think of it as stealing.

Straight to termination.  No: "Hey, you can't do that." While I was in the act when it could be corrected because she was watching me do that.  No understanding that, "Oh, she was trained that this was okay.  So if I say it's not she'll stop."   Nope.  No compassion for the idea that I'm pregnant and have to afford a baby.  No understanding on their part that I hadn't thought this was stealing when I was in the act.  Just: sign the paper, leave, and never come back.

When I got home and had my wits more about me, I re-read the page and realized there are a few problems with it.   I also thought of a few things I could have done differently.

First problem is that only one person left the money on the table that day, so I'm not sure how she saw me do it twice in that day?  "And another," what other discount?  When servers are on cash we can only give the senior 10% discount and coupons....?  So what, I dug through the used coupons pile and found a coupon that could be used on this particular check?  What a waste of time!  Why the hell would I do that!?!?!

Well, the manager saw me do it... I could have said that she was lying.  Been all like, no, I didn't do that.  I don't know how she would have been able to prove she did see it.  Then it would have been a case of he said, she said (so to speak.)  BTW this is the same manager that is leaving the restaurant.  The one that "cares so much for us."  Yeah.  I feel it.

I feel as though I'm too honest.  If I just said: What are you talking about; I never did that?  Then I would still be serving at that shit hole.  Just kidding, I'd quit because they accused me of being a petty thief.  That's offencive.

What if I didn't sign the paper?  I don't agree what is written is one hundred percent true and I don't agree with the action that is being taken.  What would they have done then?  I wouldn't have stayed.  You think I'm a petty thief?  Fuck off!  You're not worth it!  I should have at least written in the "Associate response" section that I was told this was okay to do and that everyone does it.  Then what?  Would they fire my trainers and all the serving staff?  You'd have to close down the restaurant.

Whatever.

Well... Now I have more time with my husband before the baby comes.
I will not be returning to serving positions if I can.  Hopefully from here on out I will fully integrate myself into my husband's business, since I have so much time to figure out how and do so now.

Thanks a lot bitches!

Big news!

So, I found out on July 11th that I'm going to be a mama!!!

This is going to be fun: a pregnant server.  A whole bunch of hormones running through my body while I'm dealing with rude customers, heavy lifting, and ... everything.  I'll let you know how this goes ...

I'm not quite sure how this is going to go down, and quite honestly, I'm a bit nervous about it.

For further news:  I found this at a table the other day:

:) I thought it was cute!

Oposite Day

Tonight was a really rough, crappy, don't-want-to-think-or-talk-about-it-I'm-so-pissed, night.  So, instead of going on and on about how horrible tonight was, I'm going to replace all of the "bad" words with "good" words.  (eg. bad becomes good, crappy guest becomes super nice guest, etc.)  I want to see how great my night could have been:

To start the night off I got to work with my favorite servers!!!  I love their attitudes about the job and their teamwork is phenomenal! One of them kept coming into the server area and telling us how great we were doing and cheering us on while it was super busy, and of course he was all on top of helping us all out and really pitching in as a team member.  Because of this we never ran out of anything!  Everything was fully stocked the whole night!!  Then my other favorite server with her wonderfully big attitude kept spitting out random compliments throughout the night, making all us servers so happy, our smiles were genuine at every table.

Oh, and the guests were wonderful tonight!!!  They were so polite and grateful for everything us servers do for them!  One table complimented me on how fast everything was coming out,  another table was so pleased with our portion sizes.  They were even nice about how I printed out the check saying it was exactly as needed.  I absolutely loved this table!!!  I wanted to stay there the whole night and just roll around in their compliments and good, smiling attitudes!

Seeing as everything was stocked through our rush, we never ran out of silverware, cups, ice, there was no stress whatsoever!!!  Communication was awesome! Oh, this shift was heavenly!!!

-.-

Get a real job!

I have a bachelor degree in Psychology.

This is a big accomplishment.  Now there are many job opportunities that are open to me because I have a degree.  This is huge!  A lot of companies look at a degree and see all the hard work you've done and see that you stick things through.  ... Or so my family tells me.  I'm sure they believe all this too. Their strongest belief is that I "can do so much better than a waitressing job."   They never hesitate to remind me of this either.

Of course, the economy is not taken into consideration.  Or my lack of experience.  Or even the fact that I look for jobs that require a degree, or somthing in the psychology field that I'm interested in.  Often it seems as though my feelings are not even taken into consideration.

Here's a thought: maybe I like waitressing?  Maybe I like touching peoples lives in miniscule ways and attempting to make peoples days better.  Hey, maybe I got a degree in psychology because I like people and I want to understand them, then use that knowledge to help other people.  And Maybe, just maybe that's what I feel I'm doing in my waitressing position.

No waitressing doesn't make as much money as having my own practice.  Yes, I would like to find another position at some point.  Right now, what I really want is to integrate myself into my husband's business.  Be a photographer with him and run the photo booth.  That is what I'm working towards.

When I first went into college I didn't know what degree I wanted.   My family knows that I grew up wanting to be an artist, drawing constantly.  For a while I wanted to get a degree in art, then photography.  I was told that that was just a hobby and shouldn't get a degree in it.  So then I thought I would like to be a youth minister.  When I took a psychology class for that degree psychology peeked my interest. So I ran with that and went to a university.  I was thinking that I would become a counselor... well a year before I graduated I took a counseling class, and found that was not for me.  So I graduated with a degree in psychology not knowing what I was going to do....  ***scariest time of my life*** Now I have the opportunity to go back toward my first love: being an artist, becoming a photographer!  That is what I want to do.

So thank you for your concern and want for more for me.  But this is my life.  I'm building my dream.  Let me live!!!  Stop making me feel like what I'm doing is below me.  I'm growing, learning, and enjoying my life right now.   I'm headed somewhere.  Don't push me too fast or try to hold me in the past.  I'm moving at my pace because this is my life.  And...

Today, I served....

How I see it

The schedule has been crazy!  I worked about a 13hr shift (compared to my usual 6hr shifts) then they gave me five days off, in a row.   I had a whole week off!!!  Though, they didn't give me the one day I asked for off. Ugh.

It takes a lot to work at a restaurant.  It requires a lot of patients with the guests and your co-workers!  Guests can be annoying and rude and down right crazy!  But that lasts for the time that they are there, in the restaurant, in your section, at your table.  After that you can shrug it off and hope you never see them again.  But co-workers. They're a different story.  They're the people that you know you're going to see again and again, and you could be their best friend one day and their most hated foe the next.  In a restaurant you have to share a brotherly bond with the people you work with because you're going to get close with them, physically.  You're going to share things and say things that you never meant to with them simply because they're there, you're tired and working hard, and they understand the pains you go through with guests.

Now, there's plenty of stories I could share about the guests at this restaurant, but let me tell you how I see it:

This restaurant is my restaurant.  I don't mean that I own it.  I mean that the section I'm in today is mine.  I'm (sort of) renting it from the "higher ups."

The "higher ups:"
The "higher ups" pay for me to be there, the supplies I use while I'm there, and the help I use while I'm there.  What they would give me for running this part of the store for them is quite a bit, but then they have to take some out for what they've supplied.  The stocked goods, the food, the building & maintenance of the building and grounds, the advertising, the help, etc.  So that brings their total to $4.91 an hour for me to be there running this part of the store for them.

My job:
My job is to take care of the customer the "higher ups" have provided me with through their advertising.  Take care of the section that I'm running and leave it in a suitable, clean looking section when I leave.   My real money is made through the customers: tips.  That's my real bread and butter.  The world could be in flames around the store, I could break my arm while I'm working, the worst disaster imaginable could happen and I wouldn't care.  While I'm "renting" this section, all that matters to me is that my guests are being taken care of well enough to pay me decently for doing so.  Which ends up being anywhere from $60 to $100 a shift, depending on the length of the shift and the "hot hours." ("Hot Hours:" the times when there is a good flow of people coming into the restaurant.)

Of course there are some flaws here: the guests are also paying the company for some of these goods, and the "higher ups" aren't always taking care of their end of the bargain.  The guest paying for the food they eat should return to me some of the money to my pocket from the company charging the guest for my supplies.  When there is not enough help (like when I have to be in the back making shakes and doing dishes which is not part of a server's job) or we run out of supplies (napkins, milk, ice cream, buns, ketchup, etc.) money should also be returned to my pocket for working above and beyond my job description and as compensation for the lack of tip when a guest is upset that we don't have proper supplies.

However, in the restaurant business these things happen sometimes, and I understand that! What I don't understand is how state law can agree to put us servers at below minimum wage ($7.93 right now in Florida.)  Or that companies, like the one I'm at right now, can put so many people on the schedule as to not pay for anyone to have health insurance.

I know that none of my co-workers see this job in the same light that I do (flaws aside) and it's painfully obvious when people leave without doing side work, without stocking up the service area, without saying goodbye to anyone before they leave.  When they just disappear and no one knows if they are actually gone or not you know that they know that they didn't do what needs to be done!  When I leave, I want to leave the next shift set up for success.  That includes making sure that everything in the service area is stocked and ready to go, my section is taken care of (caddies, tables cleaned, swept and mopped), the restaurant looks decent for the next guests, and the host stand is straightened up and stocked so that whatever is needed can be found easily.  That's it.  But then I have the audacity to expect that from my co-workers as well.

Story Time!

The Story of the Server with a Dirty Apron:

A server walked up to one of her tables and asked them, the usual: How are you doing today? Are you ready to order? etc.  The lady sitting at the table responds: We're good. And how are you? Dirty I see!?!?! Looking her up and down.  Referring to the (ketchup smeared, wet, spotted, stained, black) work uniform apron that was adorning her.

Yes.  I've been working hard, was the server's nice, sweet reply.


However, what the server wished she could say to this delightful woman to help her understand the depth of her remark was:
Yes. I have been working really hard.  You see: I've been serving tables, like the one you're sitting at now.  I've been doing dishes, the ones that you will be using in a moment. Aren't you glad they're clean for you to eat off of?!  I've been making shakes, the kind that you will probably be ordering in a moment. We have no one else back there making them right now, and yes they do tend to splatter across my chest every now and then.  That is the nature of the shake.  I will probably make yours, so be nice.  Or you might end up with some extra ingredients. I've been plating food... you do want to eat off a plate don't you!?! If you want I will bring it out to you on the tray, or better yet I will simply bring it out with my bare hands and set it on the table for you.  Less dishes for me.  I've been running from dirty mess to dirty mess, there have been several spills that you don't see now thanks to: Muah!  I've been cleaning this restaurant and keeping it together.  Running food out to tables, like yours, to make sure their food was hot, and I will do the same for you.  You do want your food hot?! I've also been bussing the tables you see around you.  Because I assume you and your fellow restaurant goers want to sit at a clean table, not have ketchup and fries waiting on the table and seats for you. But OF COURSE what I've really been waiting for is you to come in!  So you can judge how clean I've kept my apron throughout all of this and then I can serve you.  Busting my ass off for your every whim.  And you.  Well, you can just sit there and enjoy the nice atmosphere, food and drinks that I've created, or yet to create for you.
And, my managers say that you may also judge the crap out of me and how clean my apron is.  Enjoy!